Obituary of Barbara Shelnutt Bolender

No visitation 1954-2006 Barbara Shelnutt Bolender died peacefully in her sleep early on Saturday, November 18, 2006. Beloved wife, mother, sister, daughter and friend, she will be profoundly missed. Born and raised in Wilmington, Delaware, Barbara moved to the Pacific Northwest with her family as a teenager. She studied art at the Cornish School of Art in Seattle and the Evergreen State College in Olympia, graduating in 1975. Barbara had careers as a visual artist, a real-estate broker and a writer. Barbara loved art, food and good company. Words that come readily to mind in describing her are gracious, funny, lovely, eccentric, progressive, talented. Her home, a gathering place for an eclectic mix of people, was always filled with laughter. Barbara is survived by her beloved husband Ben Bolender, son Abraham Trabka, mother Martha Shelnutt; sisters Ann Barry, Jane Button and Sarah Plasha; nieces and nephews Alexandra & Christopher Ambrose, Brad & Abby Plasha. In March 2006, when Ben suffered a heart attack and consequent brain injury, Barbara's unconditional loving support and advocacy for Ben became an inspiration to all who knew her. She was in the process of writing "Silver Lining," a book about her experience with Ben during this time. Barbara recently spoke of gratitude for the time she was having with Ben now, which she knew could be limited because of his condition. She said she was happy and without regrets. A memorial service will held at 10:00 a.m. Wednesday, November 22, 2006, at Unity Church of Olympia, 1335 Fern Street SW, Olympia, Washington 98502. In lieu of flowers the family suggests a donation to Brain Injury Association of Washington, 800 Jefferson Street, Ste 600, Seattle, Washington 98104. (206)388-0900. At a later date there will be a celebration with food, music and fellowship held from 5 to 9:00 p.m. Saturday, December 2nd, 2006 at Lacey Community Church, 4501 14th Avenue SE, Lacey, Washington 98503.